shooting elephants

McCain's Response

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 13:10:00 -0400

The New York Post (owned by Rupert Murdoch. just sayin’) published the John McCain op-ed that the New York Times refused to run. The Times said something about McCain’s piece not fitting with their liberal agenda and offical pro-Obamania! stance.

Anyways, here’s the McCain response (please try to ignore the huge Iraqi prime minister head that is inexplicably looming over this page).

And Obama’s piece published last week.

Places of a Lifetime

Fri, 11 Jul 2008 09:21:00 -0400

Places of a Lifetime:

National Geographic Traveler’s top 50 destinations

I’ve made it to 22 so far.

Is this the end of the high-five? - Safire, NYTimes

Fri, 11 Jul 2008 09:11:04 -0400

Is this the end of the high-five? - Safire, NYTimes

China’s new 10 yuan bills do not feature the omnipresent...

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 16:55:04 -0400

China’s new 10 yuan bills do not feature the omnipresent MAO.

Yes, I am still alive.

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 11:45:07 -0400

I’ve been insanely busy over the past couple of weeks and I haven’t found the time to post. I will return though, probably after July 4.

Ralph Steadman Interview

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 15:55:44 -0400

Ralph Steadman Interview:

Cowpooling

Tue, 10 Jun 2008 10:06:00 -0400

Cowpooling:

Forget cowtipping. These days, city slickers are cowpooling - teaming up to buy the whole animal from local family farms.

This seems reasonable.

Do Not Hire Me to Fix Your Roof

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 12:22:58 -0400

For anyone reading this blog who might want to hire me: I have no practical skills that are useful in everyday life beyond the basic actions that keep me alive (i.e. proper protocol for ordering at restaurants, map reading, etc.)

I became shockingly aware of this fact last night when my buddy’s car refused to start and began smoking from the interior vents.

Now, I understand how a combustion engine works. I get what a valve train is. I sort of know what the ignition system is all about and I could probably describe it to a six year old, who would be moderately impressed for about 15 seconds. But I do not know what to do when something not so obvious goes wrong. My knowledge of car engines is therefore just as useful as my knowledge of quantum mechanics or the solo work of The Doors’ Ray Manzarek.

This being my 26th birthday, I resolve to become a real, functioning adult who is useful in situations that do not require trivial knowledge of New Wave British Heavy Metal Bands.

Look forward to future essays on this topic.

NBA Finals Predictions

Thu, 05 Jun 2008 16:05:27 -0400

KG will have a filthy baseline dunk over the unkempt Spaniard, Pau Gasol. He will then revert to taking turnaround jumpers while fading away from the basket for the rest of the series.

Doc Rivers will be monumentally outcoached by the ZEN MASTER.

We will all be tired of grainy “Lakers, Celtics, the Rivalry Continues” montages.

All of America will know the name Sasha Vujacic.

Kobe Bryant will have one transcedent performance. Probably Game 2 in Boston, drawing the inevitable comparisons to the “God disguised as Michael Jordan” game in ‘86. This will leave Bryant fat and happy enough that the Lakers drop Game 3 at home.

Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom will become frustrated with P.J. Brown’s “OLD MAN STRENGTH.”

The Lakers will win Game 4 soundly. Not coincidentally, Sam Cassell will see significant minutes with Rajon Rondo in foul trouble.

Most unexpected celebrity sighting, Los Angeles: Arsenio Hall

Most unexpected celebrity sighting, Boston: Matthew LeBlanc

Celtics in 7

Bigger moment in United States history: Obama securing the...

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 16:26:45 -0400

Bigger moment in United States history: Obama securing the Democratic nomination or normalizing the fist bump as a celebratory gesture?

Your Debut Album

Fri, 30 May 2008 17:17:13 -0400

poortaste:

1 - Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

If you want to do this again, you’ll hit refresh to generate new quotes, because clicking the quotes link again will just give you the same quotes over and over again.

3 - Go to flickr’s “explore the last seven days” http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Put it all together, that’s your debut album.

Wow. My debut album:

Fireballer - “Do What We’re Doing!”

New campaign work from Scott Hansen

Thu, 29 May 2008 15:02:03 -0400

New campaign work from Scott Hansen

School of Art, Design, and Media

Thu, 29 May 2008 14:36:30 -0400

School of Art, Design, and Media

Some Potentially Useful Information!

Thu, 29 May 2008 14:07:03 -0400

Some Potentially Useful Information!: A nimble description of how to shell fresh peas, from Chocolate & Zucchini

Shotgun Rules

Thu, 22 May 2008 09:19:39 -0400

Shotgun Rules: vitally important cultural knowledge as you prepare for your Memorial Day road trip: the rules of calling “shotgun”

"Q: What’s hard for you? A: Mostly I straddle reality and the imagination. My reality needs..."

Wed, 21 May 2008 16:08:35 -0400

“Q: What’s hard for you?
A: Mostly I straddle reality and the imagination. My reality needs imagination like a bulb needs a socket. My imagination needs reality like a blind man needs a cane. Math is hard. Reading a map. Following orders. Carpentry. Electronics. Plumbing. Remembering things correctly. Straight lines. Sheet rock. Finding a safety pin. Patience with others. Ordering in Chinese. Stereo instructions in German.”

- Tom Waits interviews Tom Waits

The Whole Earth Catalog

Mon, 19 May 2008 15:51:06 -0400

The Whole Earth Catalog

It certainly feels like something is happening. Record crowds in...

Mon, 19 May 2008 10:22:25 -0400

It certainly feels like something is happening. Record crowds in Oregon for Obama.

yourdp: Oh America you’re fat but damn it all tastes so good! ...

Thu, 15 May 2008 16:28:30 -0400

yourdp:

Oh America you’re fat but damn it all tastes so good! Article comparing portion sizes from 20 years ago to today.

*1200 calorie Chipotle burrito not pictured.

Generation Slap: Radar Online

Thu, 15 May 2008 16:18:47 -0400

Generation Slap: Radar Online:

Gen X rant about people like you and me.